Have you ever experienced that moment when you're driven so hard by an itchy feeling inside of you, to complete an action although you know for certain that no benefit would come out of it? You get an adrenaline rush, your excitement is heightened, such that you can no longer remain on the safe and easy side, resting on your laurels.
It could be a warm, humid night when you're wrapped up in your blanket despite the heat, just because you feel insecure without a piece of linen over you. Several thoughts run through your head, preventing you from resting your head against that little spot on Slumber's arm. Your heart beats thump harder against your chest, your palms sweat and when you look at the time, you realize what an ungodly hour it is. That little persistent spark of imperativeness finally leads to an explosion inside of you and you shoot up, sitting like a straight "L" on your bed, with determination all over your face. Moments later you're out there, doing the very thing you know you'll live to regret if you didn't. It's truly a blessing if you've gone through such an episode. Everyday, we live life being too cautious and calculative. We weigh the outcomes of the different possible actions and options we have, discarding those that won't add much value to our lives. By doing so, we may have saved on effort and time, but one day into the future, we would be lamenting to ourselves in the "I-should-have.." fashion.
For me, moments such as those come from rare 'attacks' of inspiration. Pardon the use of such a negative word but it well befits my introverted and passive nature. I always choose to stand away from a crowd, or behind a curtain on the top floor of a building, where I could see without being seen. I always play safe, I sleep my life away and let it pass me by. So when my Muse comes, it is an attack, it always is. With a tight tug at my heartstrings, she bids me to break free from my reservations, and I find it hard, almost impossible to ignore her call.
So yes, there were times when I did things although I knew nothing would come out of them. I slaved towards completion, because I wanted the calm that would most certainly come afterwards. I may have produced something mediocre as a result, but what did I care? I could proudly hold my head up high and smile, almost smirk at my recklessness; and I tell you dear reader, the satisfaction that settles in your heart at the end makes the little adventure worth your while after all.
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